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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27950384">little lies</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/achillesep'>achillesep (orphan_account)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Prose Poem, References to Depression, Trauma, i guess ?? idk, kind of . honestly no idea how to tag this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:49:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>713</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27950384</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/achillesep</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sometimes the war makes everything hard. It’s over but it’s still here. Like a sickness, like all horribleness, it takes root and poisons Leo but when he wakes up to the sun shining softly into his apartment, making a halo of Jason’s hair, Leo thinks it’s bearable. That he can carry the weight of it. That they're okay."</p><p>peace in the aftermath</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jason Grace/Leo Valdez</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>little lies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>feeling sleepy so i wrote this maybe it makes sense maybe it doesn't ...? no idea. but lmk if it does !!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sometimes there are moments like slips where Leo feels like he’s burning himself away again, flying too high, is getting pulled in by the gravity of the sun and there’s nothing he can do about it because it’s what he was made to do, to be. To be the reluctant martyr, to die for something bigger. But he didn't. He made it out and some days he’s still stuck in the memory of the slow-motion car crash that was the war and some days it’s like it never happened at all; like he didn’t feel his strength giving out and didn’t feel himself turning into a falling star, meteor, ashes to ashes he fell fast and hard and snapped his neck and died but it didn't take and some days it’s okay. It’s easy to forget when he’s looking up at the sky, and by the sky I mean the horizon, and by the sky I mean Jason’s weary eyes because they’ve both borne the weight of their futures. Their big futures. Burdens. Doom. So I think that maybe, just maybe, they have a right to be tired and a right to worry about university and jobs and whether or not Leo remembered to turn off the stove and if Jason forgot to get popcorn when he was at the grocery store. So I think that maybe, just maybe, they have a right to be people and to the small acts of domesticity all spelling out <em> l-o-v-e </em>.</p><p>Sometimes Leo will trace the big and little bruises on Jason’s back that spell out <em> h-e-r-o </em> and weep, and other times he’ll lie his head in Piper’s lap as a movie plays softly in the background as he fades into unconscious. It’s a comforting feeling, love: a healing one, a redeeming one, a strange one. Unmapped territory. The weight of the war's a heavy one to bear and he’s gonna carry it for the rest of his life, but it’s easier now that he’s got someone to hold his hand. </p><p>Love, love, love. </p><p>Love, for Leo, had always been something far away, like something that happened in the movies, something that happened to other people. Something he didn’t deserve. There’s a myriad of Greek myths and one of my favorites goes something like: <em>we all started out with two heads and two hearts and four arms and four legs, we all started out whole but we were too happy and we didn’t do anything to deserve it. We were pried apart from our other halves because of the gods and now we're missing half the puzzle. </em> </p><p>Another one of my favorite myths (and by myths I mean lies), is that Leo gets his happy ending, gets his other half, finds the piece he’s been missing and everything falls into place. <em> To storm or fire the world must fall, </em> and just like in the days of old, of four-armed four-legged love, Leo and Jason are their other halves and pried apart but no—they stand righteous against this fate and make their own. A happy ending. No hero is happy so they are not heroes. They are not the poster children, the martyrs, the symbols they were supposed to be. They get to be human. </p><p>The myth continues, something like: <em>the life that was made for Leo was a place of violence so he left it. </em></p><p>
  <em> Tragedy was imprinted on his bones so he burned it out and remade himself into a boy.  </em>
</p><p>These are only hopes. Lies.</p><p>Sometimes the war makes everything hard. It’s over but it’s still here. Like a sickness, like all horribleness, it takes root and poisons Leo but when he wakes up to the sun shining softly into his apartment, making a halo of Jason’s hair, Leo thinks it’s bearable. That he can carry the weight of it. That they're okay.</p><p>It’s a little lie Leo repeats to himself often but if he says it enough maybe everything will be okay.</p><p>Little lies. Mantras. Feeling through the dark labyrinth of love with someone there to shine a light on it. Mapping out the details.</p><p>Everything is going to be okay.</p><p>Everything is going to be okay. </p><p>Everything is going to be okay.</p><p>He watches Jason smile.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em> Everything is going to be okay. </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i thought i liked this and rereading it I have decided. no I don't. there's something wrong with this and I can figure out what exactly but it feels like its trying to be something its not and that bugs me and yeah. but hey! if you're not extremely nitpicky like I am, leave comments n kudos :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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